'Honest Officer, Those Drugs Hidden In My Crotch Aren't Mine"

This is just too funny to let slide by.

29-year-old Jessalyn Clark, pictured above, was riding in the passenger seat of a Cadillac in Florida when the police pulled the car over because they saw her not wearing a seat belt.

During the traffic stop, Clark allegedly “pulled out a piece of paper towel from her crotch” that had three Oxycodone pills and three Xanax tablets...and then denied that the drugs she fished from the vicinity of her vajayjay were hers, according to a police report excerpted here.

Instead, she tried to finger the driver, saying that he “told her to put it down her pants.” The driver of course denied it, telling cops he had no idea "what was down her pants.”

The police decided not believe that Clark’s crotch stash belonged to someone else and charged her with two felony drug possession counts. She's now being held in the Manatee County jail in lieu of $2000 bond...and I'm certain there was a thorough cavity search involved before they put her in a cell.

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