Forum: What Historical Figure Would You Like To Be?

Every week, the WoW! community and our invited guests weigh in at the Forum, short takes on a major issue of the day, the culture, or daily living. This week's question: What Historical Figure Would You Like To Be?

Don Surber: Wilt Chamberlain. 30,000 points, 2,000 women.

Jeffrey Avalon Friedberg:If I could I would want to be the first guy who decided to have a city and be king of it. He would also have figured out that to be, and remain, king he would need a constituency of dedicated rabble.

He would have been the guy who came up with the first idea of telling the rabble what they needed to hear to keep himself in power. Lies would be okay, because the only thing that mattered would be direction and reward or punishment of my masses.

You know, let those who defy me be fired, ruined socially, or destroyed—prevented from breeding independent thinkers like themselves.

And then I’d reward those who backed up me and my special, private, social System. My backers would be the ones to get the big farming and gathering contracts, become rich and famous, get the lucrative cuneiform and symbols contracts, rock dragging endorsements, and be allowed to breed more subjects for me, exactly like themselves.

I would then also be the guy who comes up with the idea of Enforcers, to keep my special societal System running. These would be my police and special State prosecutors, or whatever I might choose to call them.

The Guy—this guy—he would have a way to harness the powers of Marketing, State rituals, and the Social Deliverers—or town news criers.

Thus, the guy, he would have his very of special political System, its purveyors, and Enforcers. He would be the Rock-con Valley and yuge Social Media guy—King.

And if I could go back in time, and be that guy, and be in charge of everything around me and mold the rabble to my Will, and keep them in line, and purvey and enforce my very special Social System: I would go back to being just a fricking goat herder and spare the world from Liberalism forever.

Rob Miller: Hmmm! Joshua, of course! Or maybe Puccini.

Fausta Rodríguez Wertz: Rosalind Russell: Beautiful, talented and smart.

David Schuler: Sir Richard Francis Burton. Explorer, geographer, diplomat, spy, scholar, poet, swordsman, linguist. Tall, dark, and handsome. One of the founders of modern anthropology. Spoke, read, and wrote dozens of languages well.

Laura Rambeau Lee:Maybe it’s my age, but thinking about this question I really can’t come up with anyone in history I would want to be. I honor those from the past who have advanced humankind and sought to better our lives. From the ancient philosophers and through the enlightenment; from our founding fathers and those who fought for the human rights of all individuals; their place in history is and should be acknowledged and their ideas and ideals taught to our children and grandchildren.

When I think back to the past I can’t imagine dealing with the hardship of everyday life of previous generations; having to hunt and raise our own food, simple things like communication, medical care, even bathing, cooking and doing laundry. The technological advancements that have happened in my lifetime alone are an incredible testament to human ingenuity. We live in amazing times. I feel a responsibility, as I am sure many of us do who have been drawn to the blogosphere, to be today’s pamphleteers and town criers, to touch as many people as possible and expose the evil forces and people in the world working to destroy our culture and our country. I feel the importance and urgency of the work we do and am happy to be living in the here and now. Whether we win or lose this fight, at least we can look back and say we were not silent.


Patrick O'Hannigan: I have the same problem Laura does -- I don't want to be anyone else.

But I'd like to have a beer with Benjamin Franklin, Thomas ("The king's good servant, but God's first") Moore, and beach volleyball legend Kerri Walsh-Jennings.


 Well, there it is!

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