The Real Banana On Politics With Weekend Monkey, 07/10/08

FF: Once again,it's time to swing through the rancid political jungle with JoshuaPundit's own political guru and former Democratic Presidential Candidate, my pal Weekend Monkey.

WM: Hideeho, primates! I'm back and I'm all yours!

FF: Indeed you are..so Monkey, how do you see the campaign going?

WM: In a word FF, schizo. There's two entirely different themes, I guess you'd say going on. First there's the abandonment by both candidates of their bases..I've never seen anything like it. McCain and Obama both seem to have figured out that die hard lefties and conservatives have no where else to go, so they're ignoring them and concentrating on the swing votes. I mean when the likes of Jesse Jackson or Bob Herbert can be caught grumbling about how Obama is talking down to black people! Normally when the nominees get chosen this early it's a time to consolidate your primates behind their leader. Not this year!

Second weird thing is that both candidates are going out of their way to broaden their appeal to people they used to diss. Obama Yo' Mama is trampling over Daily Kos and the other lefties running for the center, and McCain just finished up making nice to a bunch of evangelicals a month after he kicked two of them to the curb...go figure!

FF: Well I can see why Obama's doing it...like you say, he figures the left has nowhere else to go and he's trying to pull a Clinton, making moderate noises.

WM: Yeah,but Iraq and the FISA thing? I mean that was what he based his whole campaign on!

FF: Change,Monkey..it was you who once said to me that it doesn't have to make common sense, just political sense.

WM: Yeah, yeah...I'm glad to see that you swallowed some of my wisdom,FF.

FF: Not the verb I would have chosen Monkey, but correct in essentials. You've been right too many times for me to ignore.

The conventional wisdom seems to be that Obama is going to trample McCain pretty badly come November. Do you agree? How are you handicapping this?

WM: Way too early for a professional such as myself to be putting money down, FF but...I still think it's a lot closer than the media would have us believe.

I still think that the election is gonna be about Obama Yo' Mama rather than the grumpy old guy, but when I sniff the wind I see some major indications that it's still up in the air,which is weird in itself. I mean, my Democrats have tons of money, the media on our side and the most exciting candidate we've seen in either party for a long time. Plus, let's face it...the rethugs are handicapped by being handcuffed to Bush. Yet the nationwide polls still show McCain and Obama Yo' Mama almost tied. In 2004, Kerry was almost 15 points ahead of Bush at this same time of year andKerry didn't have any thing like the buzz Obama Yo' Mama has going for him. By all rights, Obama should be fifteen, even twenty points ahead of McCain - and he ain't. You gotta wonder why.

FF: If I could interject,Monkey...I notice you haven't really adopted any of the cute names the Left has for Senator McCain. I mean, I don't see you calling him Grampy McSame or any of that kind o' crap. Why?

WM: Well....look FF, it's a little embarrassing. You know that as a Democrat, I don't support McCain, but I gotta respect him. I cringe every time I hear some punk on my side of the aisle call him names, diss his war record or imitate that weird little speech impediment of his.

FF: He has that speech impediment Monkey because the North Vietnamese deliberately broke a bunch of his teeth at the gum line when they were torturing him.

WM: Damn, FF. I didn't know...Look, I never liked Wesley Clark much anyway and as far as I'm concerned him and the rest of the Democrats insulting McCain like that..well, they're just outta line, that's all.

FF: Y'know Monkey, it's not about the fact that he was shot down and was a POW. It's the way he conducted himself afterwards, in extreme circumstances.

WM: Yeah, I get that. Like I said I have a lot of respect for the guy,even if I don't support him politically.

FF: So, what other indications do you see that we're in for a close race aside form the polls?

WM: Well, look at Obama's VP turndowns..

FF: Turndowns?

WM: Yeah.It seems like all kinds of prospective running mates have taken themselves out of contention; Ted Strickland, who could of helped in Ohio, Jim Webb,the senator from Virgia who we talked about, Evan Bayh from Indiana, Ed Rendell from Pennsylvania, Frank Lautenberg from New Jersey,they've all said no way Jose. I even heard a rumor that Hillary Clinton told Obama no way at that meeting they had at Dianne Feinstein's house.

These people are all professionals with gorilla sized egos and ambitions. They wouldn't have turned Obama down if they thought he was any kind of sure thing.

FF: Part of it might be that none of these people want to get on the wrong side of the Clintons. They're kind of known for being just a tad vindictive about these things.

WM: Could be, FF. Could be. But so far, I'm still sniffing the wind and I see it as a close election that will probably come down to a few states in the midwest...even though so far, McCain is running a fairly crappy campaign.

FF: I see that, and it baffles me. Obama is making all kinds of openings for McCain to skewer him on his inconsistencies and McCain is mostly just letting him slide. I mean, remember that ad Obama put out about the veterans benefits legislation in Illinois that he took credit for? Turns out he didn't even vote for that bill, let alone write it! If I were McCain, I would have had an ad up before you could say hope n' change.

WM: Yeah , I know, it's weird. I think McCain knows it too, which is why he just shook up his campaign staff.

FF: And debates, Monkey..Obama turned down McCain's challenge for townhall type debates and at present there aren't even any debates scheduled...I can't imagine why McCain doesn't try to embarrass Obama into committing to at least one by pushing that in public.

WM: Don't ask me why Republicans do anything, FF..you wouldn't like my answer.

FF: Hmmpph! Anyway, who do you see as Obama's running mate? Both of us figured Webb had the inside track.

WM: Yeah, I think he would have brought the most to the table. Personally, I think Karen Sibelius, the governor of Kansas has the inside track.Or like you said before, maybe Bill Richardson, because he's Hispanic.

FF: Why Sibelius?

WM: Well, she's female, so Obama might pick up a few angry Hillary voters.

FF: If Obama was going to go for a female, I think Claire McCaskill from Missouri might be a better choice. She's a long time Obama supporter, and even though she's not all that popular in Missouri the Donkeys have a lot more chance carrying Missouri if she's on the ticket than they do Kansas with Sibelius. Only problem with both of them is that it makes it too much of a midwestern ticket. And let's not forget about Tim Kaine from Virginia.

WM: Is he still in the running? yeah, I could see that. And I hadn't thought about McCaskill, but yeah, that might be enough to tip Missouri. What about McCain?

FF: I still think Tim Pawlenty or Tom Ridge are the front runners.I don't think it will be Romney. I also think it won't be Giuliani, although that's a lot more likely than Mitt and I think he'd be great at the job.

WM: McCain and Rudy? Maybe. Seems like to much of a moderate ticket for the Rethugs if you ask me.

FF: Well, we'll soon see, I suppose.

WM: That we will, FF. Until later...be good, primates!