Friday, August 06, 2010

Weekend Monkey On Politics: The Prop 8 Ruling - Monkey See, Monkey Do

Hidey Ho, Primates! Welcome to the one and only Real Banana, your source for the real poop on politics.

Let's do it and get to it..

This week's Big Nooze was the Prop 8 ruling on gay marriage by Judge Vaughn Walker in San Francisco (where else).

I was glad to see that this judge ruled in favor, especially since this Monkey won a few shekels on it. I mean, did any of the primates expect anything else? If Walker had ruled any other way, would his pals down at the bath house or over in the Castro have ever talked to him again?

Frankly, I think the primates are entirely too stirred up over this.I mean, who cares who's boinking who and what they call it, as long as there are consenting bodies involved? And who cares how many bodies or what age or gender? It's not the government's business.

This ruling basically ended years - centuries - of prejudice by saying that limiting the definition of marriage to being between a man and a woman is unconstitutional,not to mention immoral. I support that, because it opens up a new era of freedom and sets an important precedent, one that affects this Monkey directly.

For years, the inter-species love between humans and their primate cousins has been the love that dare not speak its name, to borrow a phrase from some antiquated porn novel.

Think I'm exaggerating? Watch the relationship between Gloria Swanson and her beloved chimp in Sunset Boulevard and read between the lines. Or that of the late Michael Jackson and Chatter, or Travis and his long time lover Sandra Herold.

Who knows how much the tension and stress of Travis and Sandra having to live a lie contributed to that tragedy? What about their rights, their happiness?

Now, with this new found freedom, couples like Travis and Sandra no longer have to live in the closet - they can be free to live their lives as they see fit. That's exactly what happened in a lot of countries in Europe after they finally decided to legalize same sex marriages.The laws against what we still refer to here in America as bestiality fell apart, and there was a lot more love in this world,lemme tell ya..

Now, once the lawyers and judges do their thing, we can experience the same thing here. Climb the tree with me and envision an America where marriage is whatever you want to make it, with who ever you want to make it with and mean whatever you want it to. No limits.

I don't make a habit of quoting ReThugs, but Dick Cheney was more right than he knew when he said "Freedom means freedom for everybody."

The political angle? Yeah, my Democrats may lose some votes in the short run. But as we see more inter-species relationships it's going to open up a whole new constituency for them. And probably for me. And that can only be a good thing.

Later, primates!

Weekend Monkey was a Democratic candidate for president in 2008 and is JoshuaPundit's> political Guru. He can be reached for personal appearances,freebies and interesting offers at

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Anonymous said...

This is one of the sickest things I've ever seen. Who is Weekend Monkey really?

Weekend Monkey said...

That's the same sort of baboon poop people used to throw at interracial marriage, pal.

Monkeys and apes deserve the same rights the primates do.

Darth Vadar was right, freedom means freedom for everybody.

You better be prepared to roll with the times chum-mmmp. Someday we may even have a monkey president.

louielouie said...


Speaking of antiquated porn novels, your posting certainly puts a whole new meaning into the phrase “spank your monkey”, now don’t it.
Or would that be a “hole” new meaning?
I digress.
Chimpy, it certainly is obvious when you write your own material and don’t plagiarize ff essays.
That comment about gloria swanson and her chimp is ranked third out of 941,000 items in a google search.
I neither have, nor want, a clue as to what other people are searching for, but I bet you’re sure generating traffic for ff.
Myself not being social, or animal, I don’t understand the m/j and chatter comment, but I understand that bubbles his chimp, hasn’t seen a penny of that 2 mil m/j promised him. Maybe it’s a “death at a funeral” type thing.
As for, love your partners dare not speak, what is gonna happen to inter-species relationships, if, say, travis were a tracy? And what of sex change operations for the different species?
Is gerbiling considered inter-species relations?
You need to think of these things before you open your bananahole, and come into a public forum like ff blog and tooting your own horn.
Monkey boy, I don’t know how you keep hacking into ff web-site. But you must have something either extremely embarrassing or incriminating on ff.

Weekend Monkey said...

So, Louie Loser, this is quite a day.

First you finally acknowledge that I've always done my own work after all the nasty poop slinging and accusations from you.

And then, you actually admit that others appreciate my wisdom and influence.

There's hope for you yet.

Right Truth said...

I missed this when you posted it, great job.

I was thinking... (I know, sometimes rare)

"Marriage" is an established entity. Everybody knows what marriage means, a man and woman.

"Gay" marriage is a new, different entity. Do these legal ranglings really even apply? Shouldn't this be something NEW, something that is apart and different from true marriage? Something that should be voted on alone, stand alone, not connected to ... true marriage? I'm just asking.

Gay marriage never existed in history. We've had "dog" marriages, complete with doggie cakes, top hat and white dress, for dogs whose owners plan to "mate" them. Always a male and female involved, never heard of same sex dog marriage, which of course neither of which are legal.

"Marriage" has always been between a man and woman, not between two of the same sex, not between an adult and baby, not between a human and an animal. (This gets made fun of, but you just wait ... Remember that woman who owned a chimp, she ate with it, SLEPT with it, drank wine with it, bathed it, dressed it, went on walks with it ... until it ripped the face off her neighbor and was put down. Don't tell me she would not have married that chimp if it was legal)

Right Truth

Freedom Fighter said...

Glad you enjoyed it Debbie...but I am a mere conduit for Weekend Monkey's wisdom.

It's a shame that he didn't get more attention back when he ran in '08.

My own thoughts on this run on two tracks:

1) The Constitutional issues involved (finding non-existent 'rights' and stretching the commerce clause out of all proportion.) And allowing a judge to essentially promote his values at the expense of the majority of citizens.


2) The total long term effect on society as one of the key building blocks of that society is 'redefined' after thousands of years of human history.